profile

Jefferson Fisher

stop using these 3 phrases

Published about 1 year ago • 1 min read
​

Hey Reader,

Ever find yourself saying something that feels a little…unsure?

Like you're tiptoeing around your words?

I get it. But the way you phrase things can either build your confidence—or chip away at it.

Here are 3 common phrases that might be holding you back (and what to say instead):

#1: “I hate to bother you, but—”

You’ve just labeled yourself a bother. Now, before even saying a word the other person is thinking, This is going to bother me.

Instead, try: “When you get a moment, I’d like to grab your attention.”
​
It’s clear, confident, and shows respect for their time.

#2: “Does that make sense?”
​
​Don’t doubt your own ability to send a message, or doubt the other person’s ability to receive it.

Instead, say: “Do you have any questions?” or “Do you have any thoughts?”
​
It invites conversation without undermining your message.

#3: “I don’t want to.”
​
​This sounds like you’re on the defensive. Shift it to a preference.
​
For example: “I’d prefer that you didn’t.”

It signals that you have a standard by which you hold yourself and what they’re asking you to do deviates from that.

When you cut out passive phrases, you naturally sound more assertive and confident—and people take notice.

J

P.S. Which phrase do you catch yourself using the most? Hit reply and let me know. I’d love to hear.

*Sponsorship Transparency: I only recommend products we use and trust. If I wouldn’t put it in my own home, I won’t put it in yours. Simple as that.

Read all of my past emails here.

Inbox overloaded? Set your email frequency here.​

No longer want to hear from me? Unsubscribe.​

156 S. Main Street Ste 300 #769, Lumberton, TX 77657

​

Jefferson Fisher

Trial Attorney & Communication Expert

Simple, practical communication advice for your next conversation.

Read more from Jefferson Fisher

Hey Reader, I was overwhelmed by your response to my new workbook. Thank you for all the kind words, selfies, and even the live-time notifications when your book was delivered! I worked hard to create this resource, and I've been looking forward to sharing it with you. Your excitement makes it all worth it. This week I've got another round of 3 things for you: an inbox question, a communication tip and something I’m currently loving. Let’s go. #1. From my inbox: "How do I apply your tips in a...

7 days ago • 2 min read

Hey Reader, I see this communication mistake all the time: someone finally works up the courage to set a boundary, but then they start explaining the “why”. They add reasons, context, and justifications. Suddenly, their boundary isn’t a boundary anymore - it’s a negotiation. In this week’s episode, I’m breaking down why overexplaining is the fastest way to weaken your boundaries and sharing what to say instead. This week you'll learn: Why saying “no, because…” invites people to push back What...

9 days ago • 1 min read

Hey Reader, Thank you for the positive feedback on the new format last week. I’m glad you liked it. Quick recap, in case you missed it. My weekly newsletter will now have three sections: #1. An answer to a question from my inbox. #2. A communication tip you can try this week. #3. Something I’m currently loving. Let’s get into this week’s 3 things: #1. How do you handle a promise when the other person is not holding up their end? When a promise has conditions and the other person is not...

14 days ago • 1 min read